Sunday Glorious Sundays

Oh, Sunday - Glorious Sunday....another gift from above.....Thank you God. Gommy and Grandpa slept in this morning and them Gommy made Grandpa waffles and sausage for breakfast before Grandpa went to work. Then Gommy lit out to the beach for a glorious, glorious time at sea......well at least at the sea.

Gommy wasn't the only one who had that bright idea. I think everyone in the world was at the beach today. I could hear people talking in several different languages. There was French, German, Latin American and there were even Basques basking in the sun....ha,ha. I kill me!!!

Everyone seemed to be enjoying the beach in a different way. Gommy saw jet-skis, wave boards, surf boards, small sail boats, dive boats, frisbees, sunbathers on blankets, un-sunbathers under umbrellas that looked like puffed up beach balls with their colored stripes.....and then there was Gommy on her iridescent green float just watching and enjoying everyone enjoying. Even the Good Year Blimp was sending digital tidings from its belly from above......As Gommy was bobbing along on the gentle waves, a thought popped into my head. The way the water feels so soothing when you are immersed in it and just floating in the warm gentle waves and feeling everything is right with the world, must be exactly what it feels like when you are in the warm fluid of your mothers' womb. Ahhhhh how peaceful. Nothing can possibly be wrong on a beautiful day like today.

Now it is time to get ready for Gommy to go to work. There will be more people from all around the world coming in to Gommys' work tonight to enjoy delicious candy and ice-cream. It is so nice to be around people that are happy and enjoying themselves. It is quite contagious you know and Gommy 'gets' the happy bug all the time just watching everyone laughing and having a good time.

Now all you bloggers out there go out and find something fun to enjoy. It may just be sitting in your own backyard and enjoying a cold lemonade and watching all the stars in the sky when they come out later tonight. If you come to Gommys' work, just laugh and eat good candy and ice-cream enjoy yourself and Gommy will give you a big smile and a wink.....that way you'll know it's me..........((*>*))

My Daughter

Gommy is going to share some thoughts about a wonderful daughter (my Tracey) with you today. I wrote these pieces a few years ago and came across them in my document file....but they are much more than documents to Gommy. Hope you enjoy them and they make you tell your own daughters how much they mean to you. Give them a big hug and kiss and let them know the depth of your love. It is the best gift you can give your children. I am Blessed. Thank you God...............Have a great life everyone!!!!

Time for my Daughter

She was so tiny, my bundle of joy,
A welcome addition to our first, a boy.

What did I do to deserve such perfection?
Those eyes, that hair and that velvet complexion!

She thinks I’m the greatest person of all,
Please let me live up to an order so tall.

I want to slow time so I’ll have her much longer,
But I know someday soon she’ll too start to wander.

Please keep her safe and happy and free,
And don’t disappoint her in all that she’ll be.

She trusts me to teach her only good things,
If I do my job, she can soar with those wings.

I thought time was endless but now I can see,
It went much too fast and how could that be?

If I had just known, I’d have savored each minute,
No rushing or cleaning or being the cynic.

I’d spend every second with her every day,
Not feeling the time I had squandered away.

The most wonderful times there ever would be,
In my life, my existence, if only I’d seen.

So let me enjoy her now that she’s grown,
A daughter turned friend, the theme of this poem.

I promise I’ll cherish each wonderful day,
And be happy I have her til’ my dying day.

BECAUSE OF YOU . . . .
. I have something to be proud of
· I know what it feels like to smile inside
· I know I have experienced true love.
· I know what joy there is in motherhood
· I have grown as a person
· I know I have done something of value for this world
· I want to be a better person
· I have precious memories to grow old with
· I have learned it is okay to make mistakes
· I have learned it is okay to take time for myself
· I know I don’t have to be perfect to be valued
· I have learned it is okay to have my own opinion
· I know that I matter
· I know there is another human being that cares about me
· I know I am not alone in this world
· I know that I am blessed

Validation for Parenting

As parents, we go through many stages of doubt, guilt, fear, and many other feelings of dread while we try to raise our children.....But at the other end of the spectrum, there is supreme pride, joyful bliss, and a love beyond description that is the wonderful bonus of parenting.

Our children start out loving us as parents. As they grow, they eventually come to judge us. And as they learn some of lifes' lessons or become parents themselves, they sometimes begin to even forgive us.

As a mother of three myself, Gommy can only go by my own experience. I cannot explain how deeply my love is for my children. I lost two of my children (Terry and Tiffany) in a car accident many years ago, but they still fill my heart with love, pride and joyful bliss when I think of them.....and I think of them often every day. And my daughter Tracey fills me with all those same warm and fuzzy emotions every day now as I realize that I am so blessed to have given birth to my very own best friend....how wise of Gommy to have done that......*hee-hee*

I see my daughter doing so much better than I did as she is raising her two children now. She is cognizant of the fact that everything she and their daddy do is being absorbed by their little off-spring and that is so important to note. We parents always do try to do what is best but we do 'fall off the wagon' at times. But as Oprah often says, "If we had known better, we would have done better." But I always say that as long as we acted lovingly and in the best interest of the children, we should be forgiven any mistakes we made along the way. We are only human. Even though I do think Moms are SUPER-human......

It takes years of living to realize what affect we had on our children. Some things are never able to be corrected and it is very sad to see how peoples' lives are ruined or at least unhappy because of their childhood.

Gommy hears stories of how mothers and daughters or sons and fathers or vice versa, who are not close and don't enjoy each others company. I cannot even fathom how a parent and child can't be close.....Though I know there are many reasons this could be i.e. a parent can't keep their noses out of the childs' grown-up life, the parent is too self-centered to want to be in the grown childs' life, the parent had too many unhappy things that they are still hanging onto from their own childhood to know how to BE a parent that wants to be close to their child.....Any of those scenarios are way too sad to think of. Gommy is soooo very grateful for the wonderful relationships she had with EACH of her children. Thank you God for the greatest gift ever, (next to life itself......)

So Gommy hopes this reaches some family or families that need to reconnect for whatever reason. It is worth trying to forgive whatever the misunderstanding or unhappy memories or whatever it was that tore you apart. Love is the best medicine for most everything there is that ails you. Just remember that there may have been circumstances or reasons why things went awry. Give each other a break and kiss and make up....Go on now.....do it.....Hugs to all....Gommy ((*.*))

Happy Expectations

Good Sunday boys and girls everywhere! It is another week of good cheer and happy times. Gommy and Grandpa are going to be moving soon. Not too far away, but to a different home. The best part of it all is the excitement of looking for a place. Every time we visit a location, we begin to plan where we are going to put this piece of furniture or that lamp or the dressers and family pictures.

We had one place we were considering that was a bit small and Grandpa was all over it for some reason....Gommy, not so much...but in the spirit of keeping things on the positive side and trying to follow Gommys' own advice, I was willing to 'make do'. As things do tend to work out, the agreement with the landlord for the location fell through. Fell through isn't exactly what happened. The man didn't want to sign a lease and in these parts, (seasonal rentals), you had better get a lease or you will be getting a very big surprise come November.....HIGH lease rates.....So, off poor Grandpa went to look for another location.

The next place was wonderful (says Gommy), Grandpa, not so much........do you see a pattern here? But in the spirit of staying positive (where have I heard that lately) we both just agreed to make this one the number one 'back-up' for us both. It is kind of a positive maybe.....

The third place Grandpa found was beautiful, roomy, has an ocean view, several amenities, seems perfect right?.......BUT... for one thing, it is completely furnished and what would we do with our stuff? And for another thing, there is no iron-clad promise that all the things involved will work out to everyones' liking and there could be another move right around high-season. Er.....didn't you hear Gommy say she wouldn't consider a place without a years lease??? Well, this place has the potential of being a yearly lease if some other points are met. But if we don't get that one, no worries......it just means it wasn't right for us anyway.

Then Gommy was surfing the net (pretty techy for a Gommy eh?) and found a place that seemed too good to be true. You know the old saying, "If it seems to good to be true, it usually is!" Well, it was perfect in every sense of the word. Grandpa called the realtor and we eagerly waited for a call back. No call back that evening.....no call back the next morning. So, Grandpa drove by the location again and low and behold, the realtor was there replacing the sign on the lawn that needed repair. After speaking with the agent, Grandpa found out that the amount that was advertised in the ad on the web was per week......PER WEEK!!! Eeeeek......Never mind. It was definitely too good to be true. Oh well. We had a good night thinking about it anyway.

Now we (er, Grandpa) have another week of looking for our new wonderful home to be. It is actually quite fun not knowing where you will live. That may sound crazy, but Gommy has lived long enough to enjoy being surprised. There was a time that Gommy would be stewing and worrying about what was going to happen and being all nit-witty and nervous and driving herself and everyone else nutty until she knew every last detail.....But through many years of living and learning....Gommy knows we will end up wherever it is that we are supposed to live. We just have to go with the flow......Gommy keeps telling everyone else to go with the flow, so she better listen to her own advice. The Universe (God or whatever title you feel comfortable giving to who is really in charge) will guide us to the perfect spot. We just have to let go of the oars and our 'boat' will coast right to our front door. I just know we'll both love it and be happy. I know we'll be happy because we will CHOOSE to be happy. It is a choice you know.....

So Gommy wishes 'happy expectations' to all you bloggers out there in the future. And if you don't know every little silly detail about what it is......don't be a worry wart. Just expect everything to turn out alright and you know what?.....it will.......((*.*))

Be Careful What You Wish For...

Have you ever thought about a red car and then everywhere you look there seems to be a red car? Or have you thought about someone and then bang.....they call you on the phone or email you, seemingly out of the blue? That is when you say, "I was just thinking about you!" That is how thoughts manifest into reality. It is just the way it is. You can argue about it, but that won't change the facts. That is just the way things work. Thoughts, like everything else in the Universe, are vibrations and when they match up with a vibration that is like the thought you are thinking, it comes into being.

Gommy was thinking about why everything happens and how we all came about. It makes sense that we must all be connected because we are all experiencing this marvelous ride called 'life'. That is why the 'be careful what you wish for' advice is something to pay attention to.

Have you ever wondered why the 'rich get richer and the poor get poorer'? It is because the rich 'think' and expect to be rich and the poor are always talking about their lot in life and how hard it is to get from paycheck to paycheck. The rich expect to have all the money they need to live the life of luxury. Their mindset is of the vibrational frequency of bringing more money and wealth to themselves. The people who don't have money are bringing their own poor vibrations to them with every sad story or complaint about living without, that they are telling others and themselves all the time.

The person we listen to more than anyone else on a day to day basis is US...We have that talking going on in our heads almost non-stop and probably ninety percent of it is negative thoughts or needless thoughts about worrying about something. That very worrying is bringing more bad stuff your way. You have to change your dial or frequency if you want to change your reality.

You can tell someone that they are bringing their own misery to themselves and they will argue with you. They say that is ridiculous because who would WANT misery in their life? They may not want it but the more you push against something or bring your full attention to something, be it good or bad, that is what multiplies and manifests.

It is hard to re-program ourselves from years of behaving the way we have. But it is certainly worth trying so you can have the joyful life you were meant to have. If you already have the life you want and all your dreams have come true.....quit reading this and go about living your glorious life. God Bless......If, on the other hand, you are still beating the drum of a life full of woes.....quit complaining and start thinking about pleasant things. Things that make you smile. When you feel good and happy, you are bringing more of that vibrational frequency to yourself.

It is really that simple. The hard part is not letting any negative thoughts creep in. If they do, you have to immediately squelch them and think positive thoughts as soon as you can. Plan ahead...... Think of a nice time you had on a vacation, or a childhood memory, or a memory of a romance that was wonderful, a precious time you had with your children, a time you enjoyed with a parent that is no longer alive. Then whenever a negative thought tries to creep in.....BAM switch to the pre-planned memory that you have stored and is ready for use. It really works. Remember you are doing this for a special person.......YOU. Give it a try.....what do you have to lose???????? A few rotten negative thoughts. DUH!!!!! Ciao Babies....Hugs and Mush, Gommy

Manifesting Joy

Everyone wants to be joyful or to experience joy. That is a no-brainer. But how do we experience joy when so many things seem to be wrong or so un-joyful in our lives?

First, and this is a biggie, you have to learn to be okay with 'what is'. You don't have to be happy about 'what is', you just have to be 'okay' and accept 'what is'. Then you can plan to do something about what is making you un-joyful. Feeling okay with 'what is' happens to be the very big secret to being happy and enjoying life. You are 'going with the flow' instead up rowing upstream and against the current.

For instance, most people would probably be very afraid of losing their money or their homes. That is very understandable. But it does happen to people (many people lately) and people do live through it. In Gommys' case, it was more scary to anticipate the loss than to have it finally happen. Gommy is still the same person who had all the things and all the money. The anxiety of worrying is over and life is still good. When you can live 'without' the things you lost and be okay with it, something happens to your outlook. You find that it is better to accept 'what is' than to keep trying to hang on to the inevitable loss and being miserable about it. Of course, it is easier to 'have' money. It makes everyday life simpler to navigate. But you can still be happy with less....

Another big secret is to appreciate all you have. No matter how little it may be. There is always something to appreciate in life. Keep a journal of everything you can appreciate. You will be surprised to see how large your journal becomes if you just write in it every day. You can appreciate things like the beautiful morning sun coming up, another day of living and a beautiful sunset, the air-conditioning in your home, the bed you slept on last night, the breakfast you ate this morning, the job you are fortunate to have. You can be grateful for your spouse, your children your grandchildren, your friends. Keep writing.....because you should be grateful for all those things and much, much more. Gommy doesn't mean just check it off your list like, "Yeah, I'm grateful for this, for that, for this....." Really feel the gratitude in your heart. That is when more good and joyful things begin to come to you in a steady stream. You know why? Because you are having positive emotions instead of negative ones. Yes, there are things in your day or life that are not all joyful, but don't dwell on them. Focus on the things that went well in your day or your life. You will feel much better. I promise.........

Maybe something isn't going well with your job or someone in your life right now. When you can realize that you don't have to insist that someone agrees with you or your way of thinking (because you are okay with who you are or how you are thinking) - then you've got it.....Don't try to change the persons' mind or the situation. Change how you look at the dynamic of the relationship or the situation at hand. Don't give way to the 'drama' of negativity. Try to focus on feeling good and guess what? More feel-good experiences will come your way. You have to stop 'beating the drum' of negativity. If you want positive forces working for you in your life, you have to pick another instrument to play and think positive thoughts. I remember a poem by the ancient poet Hafiz that I loved.....it said something like - We are but holes in the flute that life blows it's breath through. (sic) If you think about it that way, we are all experiencing life and our outcomes by the way we are making the 'notes' come through our instrument.

At first, people may get defensive when you point a finger at the way they behave or about something you disagree on; but if you give them enough time, they will self-correct and realize there are other people involved in this 'life-scenario' that must be considered. We don't all have to agree on everything. We shouldn't have to change how we feel to make someone else feel better. But if they don't get it..... move on and let it pass right through you as if you were transparent.....Don't get any on you!

Another thing that brings joy to our lives is anticipating something like a vacation or having a baby or getting a home.....Most people don't enjoy the part of 'getting to' the event or the destination. They are too busy already 'being' there or having already 'received' what they want. My mom used to say, (and I'm sure she borrowed the saying), "The anticipation is greater than the realization." What that means is, by the time you get what you want or have been dreaming of, the best part is over....done....kaput.....you are already on to the next "I want". If you just realize that the 'getting there' is so much fun, you would savor every minute of thinking about and planning for 'it'....

So, "Lesson in Joy- 101" is over. Gommys' homework for the rest of your life......look for things to be joyful about. They are out there.....but you have to look for them. Stop looking toward something and start enjoying the ride.....once you get to the depot, your trip is over......

Life IS Good

Here it is Sunday again and Gommy has one more week to be grateful for. The birds are chirping, the sun is up, and Gommy has had, yet another, splendiferous week. Life is good. Good in a way that Gommy is thankful for every day of the week.

The week started with Monday and Gommy was scheduled to work at night, which left the day to be a lazy butt and just read my emails, write my blog and go to the magnificent beach......which I might add is only a few steps from Gommys' apartment. Yes, I know I am very fortunate.....Then my daughter Tracey called and asked if I could come over to her house so she could run an errand. Darn.....I had to go see Gommys' little dividends of having her own children....tee,hee. Brandon was his usual smiley, sweet self and Samantha came home after school, all cute, bubbly and animated about her day. See, I told you I was lucky.

Tuesdays' schedule was to work during the day. I love my job. An candy/ice-cream store is such a happy place to spend your work day. Then Tuesday night, Gommy and Grandpa got to stay with the grands while mommy and daddy went to a movie. It never ceases to amaze Gommy how enjoyable it is to be with the little sweeties. After dinner, Grandpa took Samantha (2 3/4 years old) in her stroller down the street to get ice-cream. It was her treat, since she has been earning an allowance......an allowance at two!!!! Mommy and daddy are sure on the ball with these younguns'. The funniest thing was Grandpa explaining the walk to the ice-cream store. The stroller was one of those light-weight umbrella strollers so Grandpa was pushing with one hand and walking beside Samantha. That is when Samantha told Grandpa, in no uncertain terms, "Grandpa! You have to use both hands when you push me." Of course, he obeyed. Then she asked Grandpa to stop when they got to the part of the sidewalk where they could see the back of her house (excuse me - castle) and she said, "Grandpa, there is Samanthas' castle, isn't it beautiful?"

Unfortunately, when they reached the ice-cream store, it had a note on the door saying that they were on vacation. Grandpa had to think fast and said, "I know what we can do. We can go to Publix (a local grocery store)". She was agreeable and it is just across the street anyway. When they came to the store Sam points and says, "There's Publix! But be careful crossing the street Grandpa. Make sure you look both ways and be very careful." Now I know Gommy is prejudiced, but she is only 2 for crying out loud. I see children all the time who are still trying to say their name at 2 and 3......Oh well, I know what I know......she is brilliant...there I said it....sue me.

Wednesday, Thursday and Friday were glorious days at work then quality time with Grandpa at night, including dinner, TV and early to bed........the older Gommy gets, the more a good nights sleep is appreciated.

Saturday was Gommys's off day and it started off and ended with enjoying the beach. The beach in the morning is so peaceful. Not many people are up yet and it seems as if Gommy is the only person left on the earth.....sounds like a movie...ha,ha. Then a shower and off to the grocery store for vittles for the week. Grandpa got home from work around 2pm and even though he was tired, Gommy talked him into going to the beach again. When we got there, we found our neighbors were playing horseshoes on the sand. Now Grandpa used to be in a horseshoe league in college and has always enjoyed playing (actually it was the winning he enjoyed). He joined in with the young men and he won!!! All of a sudden, he wasn't so tired anymore. Amazing...... But you know the old saying, "there may be snow on the roof, but there is still fire in the belly." No pun intended about the belly Grandpa......ha,ha.

Then, while looking at the newest entries in Facebook, Gommy spotted our little two month old granddaughter Kyra apparently having had a regal day at her aunts house (did I mention her aunts are only five years old?) Gommy had to LOL when she saw a picture posted with little Kyra all donned up with a tiara, beads and a bracelet. She did look every part the Princess....That is what goes on when your aunts are only little ones too! Grandpa Mike was all smiles when he saw the picture......wish we lived a little closer to her and her mommy and daddy.
That brings us up to today.....Sunday. Gommy is once again most grateful for a wonderful week of work, fun, family and good health. Gommy and Grandpa feel we are so very Blessed, and we hope all you bloggers out there have another Blessed week as well.....Maybe Gommy can talk Grandpa into going to the beach again this morning when he gets up.......;)

Ponderments (Is that a word???)

Gommy has a day off and was pondering things this morning. Like how we often don't recognize wake-up calls that are meant to be lessons in life for us. Like when we have a child that is high maintenance........could they be a mirror into how the parent is acting? Gommy thinks this may be so. Or how about people who seem to be painfully shy? Gommy sees them as being so into themselves (self-centered in a way) that they don't enjoy the beauty of nature or even their own environment. Or how we sometimes have hate for a certain race or creed or religion....when we are really all 'one'. Then there is the notion that we own the land we are inhabiting. Gommy feels we are just borrowing it for a while. More on these thoughts below.

Gommy will try to take these 'ponderings' on one at a time...... Take the child acting up. I have seen children who are acting out and behaving very badly and notice that the parent is quite a bit like they are acting. You know the old saying, "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree." Our children are little sponges and they 'pick up' how to act by observing what their parents do and how the parents behave. I have seen so many families who come into the candy store where I work and I often have to laugh to myself when the child is SOOOOOOOOOO much like the parent that it is blaring......One teen was in just this week and Gommy swears the Dad swaggered out and the boy was following him and he walked EXACTLY the same way the father did, with the same swagger. Then there was the 'loud family'. From the mom, all the way down to the little two year old, they were very loud. They sounded as if they had ipods in their ears and didn't realize how obnoxious they sounded. Coincidence? Gommy thinks not. That is what Gommy means by mirroring.

Then take the painfully shy person. Gommy sees them as looking inward so much that they don't experience the beauty of nature and all that is around them. If they are so into everything they say or do (so they aren't noticed themselves), how can they enjoy all that life has to offer? If you are one of these people, quit looking inward and observe all there actually is out there to take pleasure from. It is not all about you. So stop imagining everyone is looking at you or watching what you are doing. They are not.....the truth be told, they are so into themselves they probably don't even know you exist. Gommy has come to the conclusion that most people are unaware of most other people or how much there is to look at and enjoy in the world. How sad...........

On the subject of hate. It is a terrible waste of energy to hate anyone. We are actually all one when you think that the air in the atmosphere is breathed in and exhaled out by us all. Thus connecting us with every breath we take. We are, in essence, part of each other. To the people who are religious and read the Bible......if we all come from Adam and Eve......HELLO!!!!!

Lastly, about the land we think we own. Gommy thinks we are merely borrowing the sandy beaches, the majestic mountains and the crisp evening air that is fragrant with Night Blooming Jasmine. All those beautiful things will still be here when we are long gone, so how can we say we OWN them? They are really just being loaned to us to enjoy while we are here.

There, those are Gommys' thoughts and 'ponderments' for today. Hope everyone is looking outward and really seeing all there is to see in this wonderful world. This is your 'wake-up' call...............Enjoy!!!

Good Vibrations

Gommy wants to talk about how we are more in control of our lives than we realize. We attract to ourselves what we think about. It is all about the vibrations that we send out and then come back to us. We are doing it every day of our lives and many of us aren't even mindful of our part in how our lives are unfolding.

There are certain forces of life that take place even if we are not aware of them happening. For instance, we are all vibrations of energy that can be either positive or negative. It is like tuning into a station on the radio. You have to hit just the right spot (vibration of sound waves) to get the station you are searching for. So in life, what you put your attention toward is what comes back to you. If you are putting your attention to something negative, guess what???? You are going to get a negative response. The more you push against something, the more it pushes it back to you because putting your attention on what you don't want gives you that exact vibration. You have to stop aligning yourself with negative situations, people or even your own thoughts if you want to live a positive life.

Another way people feel unfulfilled and are just plain grump-buckets is when they are trying to control situations or people. Remember that you don't have to control things to be happy. We are all meant to experience life as joyous. Just as any parent wants the best for their children, God wants all of us to be happy. We happen to be our own worse enemies though in how we live our lives. We are constantly judging ourselves by other people or friends. We try to measure up to what our idea is of the perfect existence. The funny part is that if we could just see behind the closed doors of those who we think have this 'perfect' existence, we would see that we are all really more alike than not. Remember Oz behind the curtain. Dorothy always had the power to go back home. She was just looking for everyone else to tell her how to get there.

A belief is a thought that you have been told over and over throughout your life. Your parents, teachers and clergy may have told you things that were passed down for generations and they are now part of your belief system. Gommy is not saying all those people told you lies. They did not. They just told you their beliefs that were handed down to them over the years. There are some cultures that have the belief that a cow is sacred. You couldn't tell them anything different if you tried to over and over. So Gommy says to pay close attention to your thoughts. When a negative thought starts to crop up..............stop it in its' tracks and spin it around to something positive. I'm sure everyone has a childhood memory or a child or grandchild that they can think of and smile. Or an accomplishment we may have had or a song that always makes us feel good.

You can enhance your life experiences by trying to go with the flow. Co-create with others to bring about what you want. Be open minded and don't judge people or circumstances. Just observe. There is a lesson in most things that come to us. If we don't learn from our lessons, we will just keep experiencing the same unpleasant situations. When you can realize that you have it in your own control to either go haywire with a worry or negative emotion or to be calm and level-headed about the situation, you may begin to see how you are in control of your life. We may not like the lessons we are given, but everything happens for a reason. If things aren't going the way you want them, take a look at what your thought processes are and begin to learn from your lessons. If you keep doing the same things......you will keep getting the same results. Einstein said the definition of insanity is "Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result".

You will know if you are in the 'zone' or on the right path by the way you are feeling. The better you are feeling, the more you are allowing positive emotions and thoughts into your life. The worse you are feeling, the less you are allowing those positive elements to control the way you are thinking. Part of being happy is allowing circumstances to be as they are and not going upstream all the time trying to change or control situations. Be patient with yourself and others. Remember what Ralph Waldo Emerson said,"Adopt the Pace of Nature....Her Secret it Patience."

You Don't Know What You Have Until You Lose It...And you will lose it!

Now Gommy doesn't know if she is plagiarizing or not, but that phrase sure has a lot of meaning... It can mean something as simple as losing a job you thought you hated to something as horrible as losing a loved one.

We sometimes think something or someone will be around forever and we can enjoy it or them, at our leisure, any time we feel like it. Or maybe that the 'grass has to be greener' than what we are experienceing at the moment. That isn't the case if we don't apreciate our things or cherish our loved ones while we have them.

Take something that may seem to be a pain in the butt to you or maybe just mildly unpleasant. If it is a job......look out! If you don't watch it, there are several people out there who are looking for a job in todays' market. Believe me, you will know what it feels like to NOT have the job any longer and believe it or not, you will miss the job, if not the money it brings in. Remember, you don't say "I'm going to fun." when you are off to work. Unless you are one of the fortunate ones who have found your Dharma and love what you do for your work.

If it is a friend who rubs you the wrong way...don't worry, time will heal that problem because you won't spend as much time with that person and the friendship will just dwindle. Friendship, like any other relationship has to be nurtured. True friends are hard to come by so don't just discard one if they don't fit your perfect criteria of a friend. You may not be the perfect friend yourself, you know. Remember, you have to BE a good friend to HAVE a good friend.

If it is a spouse......the same concepts holds true here, except there are a whole bunch of other calamities that will occur if you just decide to discard a spouse....like your current way of living....like splitting everything from the tea cups to your children, like starting over again and discovering you may not be 'all that and a bag of chips' as you were when you were dating before you married.

If you think your parents are going to be around forever, think again. Gommy knows that parents can be a drag at one of your parties or get togethers, but you will miss them when they are gone. Try to remember that you too will be the parent who may seem bothersome at times and it wouldn't hurt to start building some good Karma for your own old age......

Now some obvious things we miss when we lose them are; our 20/20 vision, smooth skin, a full head of shiny hair, our memories, agility.....you can see where Gommy is going with this. You readers who are still youngish won't understand what Gommy is referring to..... but you will!!!! Some day you will be sitting and rocking in your chair and it will all come back to you. "Now I know what that Gommy was talking about." Gommy hopes when you get of 'a certain age', that you are enjoying a wonderful life with a family that enjoys your company and you have fulfilled most of what you wanted for yourself and your dreams. It goes by in a 'blink of an eye' so start planning what you want your Golden Years to be. If you are one of those youngsters who doesn't get it......humor Gommy and do yourself a BIG favor....start thinking about some of the things you may really miss when you lose them. And you will lose them......Good luck youngins'...............

Independence Day

Here we are, a day after the Fourth of July, 2009. It has been two-hundred and thirty-three years since our grand country gained its' independence and we have many brave men and women to thank for our still being able to celebrate the day. Because of their service to our country, we are able to watch our parades and gather together for our cook-outs and eat our hot dogs and drink our lemonade and enjoy the peace we sometimes take for granted.

Gommy was honored to be asked to judge the floats and other parade vehicles yesterday at our local hometown festivities. It was too, too cute to see the little faces of the little children who had their bikes all decorated with red, white and blue every things......It was a really big deal to them and it was touching to see their excitement, even though many of them probably didn't realize what we were celebrating! It was also heart-warming to see the parents, who had obviously worked tirelessly on the decorations as well and were just as excited. It was the first parade for many of the kids and it was just plain wonderful to see everyone celebrating and having fun.......

It brought back many memories of Gommys' childhood. My mom loved parades and we watched every Thanksgiving Day parade on TV each year......it was mandatory. And Gommy remembers enjoying the Easter Parades with the Easter Bunny bringing in Spring each year. There were also the yearly 'Candy Cane ' parades held by the local American Legion Post. Gommy can remember the thrill of catching the candy that was thrown by the kids on the floats. Then the last float carried the most important occupant of the whole she-bang......Santa Claus!!!!

The parade Gommy judged yesterday had the same candy thrown from floats. There was the same anticipation from the children standing on the parade route who were trying to catch the flying prizes. There were quite a few adults too who were trying to catch some candy along with reliving some of their childhood memories....

Then, later on in the evening, thousands of people gathered on the beach to listen to music being pumped out into the night air and watch the beautiful firework display. There were families, couples, friends, strangers and all kinds and sorts of people gathered just to enjoy the wonderful night together. There was no fighting or arguing anywhere. There were just people who were sitting on lawn chairs, or squares of blankets, sheets or beach towels side by side watching and oohing and ahhing at the free display and enjoying the music and each other. Gommy could imagine people all over the country who were sitting outdoors at lakes, parking lots, parks or just in their own backyards, who were doing the very same thing.

Gommy feels a whole lot better about our country when people come out and gather for celebrations like parades and fireworks displays......It is a good feeling to see Americans and people from many other countries enjoying and sharing the freedom we are Blessed with in the United States of America.

So Gommy thinks we should all be grateful for another year of the freedom we enjoy and not take it for granted. We should also say a prayer for the men and women who are still fighting for our freedom in those far away countries yet today. May God Bless them and and keep them safe until they can return home. And to all of you........may God continue to Bless you as well.

A Salute to Mommies

Gommy got to thinking about how unappreciated a mommy is most of the time. I know everyone says they know how important the 'job' of motherhood is, but most people forget how much is involved in doing the 'job' correctly and how much it really entails.

To all you mommies out there, Gommy feels your pain. Not that it is a pain to raise your children, because it is not a pain, it is a joyful undertaking. But the 'pain' of never doing anything by yourself again is highly underestimated. When was the last time a mommy put on make-up without a live appendage clinging to her leg and usually crying because they knew mommy was going out? Why else would she be attempting (or bothering) to put make-up on? Or when a mommy is driving her car, when was the last time she could jam to Motley Crue instead of 'I Love You, You Love Me.....", or 'The Farmer in the Dell"?


Going to the grocery store is always a hassle when the kids come along. Everyone wants something different, or someone is cranky (that can be either the kids or the mommy), or if there is more than one child going with mommy, she has to keep her eyes on both or all of the children with her and hope they don't knock anything off the shelves or get lost in the store.

Mommy is usually the 'taxi-driver' to all school functions, sporting events or practices, dance and/or aerobic classes. Mommy is usually the one to make the lunches, she washes the clothes, she cleans up the house, and is the designated secretary and treasurer of the family who also keeps the dentist and doctor visits up to date. She is a virtual and indestructable 'Wonder-Human' ! Who can never get sick herself, I might add.

Mommies are usually the ones that have to be the designated driver when mommy and daddy have a chance to go out for a date night. Besides the DUI factor, someone has to be functional in the morning when the kiddies get up.

Gommy proposes that there is a Mother's Day one day of each month. It really isn't too much to ask and it is actually long overdue. Mommies give of themselves 24/7 and 12 months a year for a couple of decades per child!!! What would twelve days out of a year to honor mommies hurt? On Mother's Day each month, mommies could do whatever she wanted and she wouldn't have to do anything for anyone else, not even her husbands' mother. She could get a massage, she could go to the movies, she could go to the beach or the lake, she could sleep in to any hour she felt like or.............she could just drive by herself in the car and listen to whatever radio station she wanted and when she was at home, she could watch anything she wanted to watch on TV the whole day.......She should even have a pink-cape to wear to signify what a remarkable woman she is......

So hail to Moms everywhere. Gommy knows how wonderful you are. I bet there are others who know how great you are as well and if you get your 12 days a year as Gommy proposes, someone will be standing in for you and they will surely 'get it' by the end of the year.....Ya' Think?????

Acceptance of What Is

It has been a few days since Gommy has written on her blog. No, it wasn't 'Bloggers' Block', it was work, work, work. Then Gommy and Grandpa Mike went to see a movie last night. It was a very, very sad movie. The movie was about losing a child. Gommy knows a few things about losing a child. In fact, losing two children and a husband. So today Gommy will write about loss. And then about acceptance of the loss.

It is very frightening and scary to lose a husband. Especially when you are a couple with young children. All of a sudden, the remaining parent has ALL of the responsibility for the children. It is hard enough when you have someone to share the raising of your children. When you are the surviving parent, you have a whole other bag of pitfalls and mistakes you can and probably will make with your children. Gommy feels, from her experiences, that as terrible as it is to lose a husband, it is so much worse to lose your child. Gommy has experienced both tragedies and as much as it hurts to lose your husband, there is no measure of the hurt you feel when your children die. Your heart doesn't feel as if it can go on beating again. Or that it even should go on beating. But it must and you know deep down that it must.

I thank God everyday that I have my daughter Tracey. Gommy can't even fathom the terribly unfortunate people who lose everyone in their family to a fire, accident or airplane crash. Tracey and I had and still have each other as family. We have shared memories of her Dad and Terry and Tiff. We share a grief that never does completely dissolve. But we also share very wonderful family memories as well.

The road out of grief is different for everyone. Some people never 'get over' their loss. 'Get over' doesn't seem right either because you never 'get over' losing a loved one. But how you deal with the loss is what makes the difference. Gommy thinks another analogy that is better to describe the feeling of family loss is like the spokes on a wheel. When one is missing, it is always missing and you can't replace it. Not even if you put in new spokes. Every holiday, birthday, a special place you all visited together, etc. is impacted by the feeling of loss. You hear a song, smell a smell, see something you know they would like, wonder if they would like some new invention or KNOW they would just love some new contraption that is new i.e. TEXTING....Gommy knows Tiff would be just 'running off at the fingers' with that invention. When Gommy hears a really good joke, Terry is the person I think of. I wish I could tell it to him because he was probably the funniest person Gommy ever knew......I miss sharing humor with Terry.

The subject line of this blog about acceptance will be very hard for some people to grasp. Acceptance is a gift you give yourself. The loss is not going to change but the way you deal with it can be. Many people become bitter and take their loss out on the world. Some just withdraw into themselves and never rejoin society. Some do manage to work through the grief and have a happy life after a time. You must remember that your loved ones would want you to be happy. Ask yourself if you were the one that had passed on, wouldn't you want your family to go on with their lives and be happy? Sure they would and you know they would in your heart.

It takes a long time to get to accept your loss. It takes work on yourself and sometimes it may even take therapy from someone who deals with the feelings of loss. When you first lose someone, you go through many stages of loss. There is everything from deep, deep sadness to denial to anger to helplessness. You have to go through each phase and if you try to skip one......look out! It will come back to bite you later on. There is no escaping all of the phases. If it is too painful to go through a certain phase, give yourself a break and wait a while. But do yourself a bigger favor and try to work through it because it won't go away. You have to face it.You may feel that if you accept it, you are saying you don't care. That is not acceptance. Acceptance is knowing you can't change something and you stop trying to change something that is impossible to change. We don't know why bad things happen. They just do.

It would be nice if something good could come out of the loss of a loved one. Many times a foundation is set up to find a cure for a disease that took someones' life one or a park is made and named after someone that has passed. Grandpa and Gommy started a scholarship fund from a golfing tournament we held, so kids from Terry and Tiffs' high-school could get a head start on a college education.

After a time, you will find that you can still enjoy things in your life. You will begin to look forward to a holiday or a special occasion that is coming up. There may be grandchildren that will fill your life with so much joy that you will have to love living again. Life is precious and should be enjoyed. I read somewhere that life is a gift and that is why it is called the 'present'.

So, Gommy says to remember to be thankful and grateful for every day you have here on this Earth. Even more so, be thankful for the wonderful years and memories you have of your loved ones. Gommy always says that she is grateful for the 17 and 22 years of pure bliss she had with Terry and Tiff. You can still make wonderful memories with the family you still have. And remember also that it is NEVER too late to "Live Happily Ever After."