Gommy was thinking about what I would write about today and thought of the subject of 'advice'. Gommy would love to be the next "Dear Gommy" advice columnist like the well-known and respected 'Dear Ann' or 'Dear Abby' of newspaper fame. Gommy got to thinking about the actual word 'advice'. The definition comes from the Latin - vis - which means 'see' or 'seem' or translated to the word 'advice' - 'to seem', as in what would 'seem' to be a better choice. A word that is related to 'advice' is 'ad-vis-able. Used in a sentence it would be; "The doctor doesn't think it is 'advisable' to take this medication." Meaning it doesn't seem to be a good choice.
Advice is a tricky position to tackle. If you offer your advice, as in, "If you want my advice.", and the other person hasn't asked for it, the actual answer from whomever you are talking to is most often - No thanks! And advice that is asked for is rarely ever really wanted. I know, Gommy said 'asked for'. But what usually happens when someone asks for your 'advice' is they really just want you to agree with their point of view. You must be very careful before you give your advice because we are all guilty of giving advice based on our own biased opinion. What we do is project our own feelings or experiences onto the scenario of the persons' predicament who is asking for advice. That rarely works because everyone has their own 'stuff' going on and what would work for one person doesn't necessarily translate to being the right way to handle something for another person.
That is why the newspaper advice columns did so well in answering questions they received from strangers. There was less bias involved precisely because the columnists didn't know the questioner. They may have had some of their own 'stuff' going on in their answers, but not knowing the person asking, they could answer more objectively.
Being human, it is hard to answer a request for advice with complete objectivity. If the person asking is a relative or close friend, the question may be answered to the benefit of the person who is being 'questioned' and not for the benefit of the persons asking for the advice. Example: A person is asked, by a friend, what they should do about a certain male they are interested in. The 'questioned' one may be afraid that their friend wouldn't have as much time with them any longer if they become involved with someone so they advise against getting involved with the male they are asking about. Or, they may just be jealous of the friends' attraction to someone else. That may sound funny, but there are many people out there who are very jealous of other peoples' stuff, looks, family dynamic, careers, children, etc. So be careful who you ask 'advice' from and be even more careful of giving 'advice' so that you are answering in a way that is really right for the other person.
So, if you want Gommy's advice........keep reading my blogs. I'm full of it... (advice I mean)!!
