Hello to all! Guess what Gommy is going to talk about today? Can't guess? Okay, it is about relationships. Now, there are all sorts of relationships, i.e., mother and child, siblings, boss and employee, friend to friend, etc. But Gommy is talking about the relationship between a man and a woman for this piece today. Sometimes the relationship is between a girl and a boy when it is 'young love'. Ahhhhhhhhhh, remember that feeling when you first become attracted to that special someone? Those butterflies in your stomach when you think of them, that seeing your special one through a misty, rose-colored glow? When you are away from them, you envision them in slo-motion, running towards you with the anticipation of pure bliss. Everything they say and do is just wonderful. They are the funniest person in the whole, wide world. They are the smartest person in the whole, wide world. You can't get enough of them, you want to talk to them all the time and be with them all the time. When you aren't with them, you are constantly thinking about them and can't wait until you are together again.
WAIT! Where did those feelings disappear to? What the heck happened to all those butterflies -
those ten-thousand volts of emotions we were feeling all the time? Does your partner wonder where all those wonderful feelings went as well? Gommy thinks it is something called 'Familiarity'. My mother used to say "Familiarity breeds contempt". What I think that means is the more you are with someone; be it a friend, sibling, a spouse or significant other, the more probable it is that they begin to irk you. The very same things that we found so adorable at first, now becomes grating......You know, like that loud 'blinking'.
They say there is a 'lid for every pot'. And when you look around, it does seem that is true. Think about your own circle of friends. I will venture to say there are very few of your friends significant others that you can imagine yourself with as their "lid". You probably aren't on anyones' short list either, so don't get too smug.
Relationships are similar to anything worth having and nurturing in our lives. They take work. Lots of work. If you just let it be, it will die like a house plant that you forgot to water. Gommy thinks one of the major things that happen with a relationship is that when two people decide to spend the rest of their lives together they are each under a HUGE misconception. That being in the case of the woman, she thinks she will be able to change anything that she finds annoying about her man once they get married. In the case of the man, he thinks his lovely, wonderful woman is never going to change how she takes care of him and laughs at his every remark. WRONG....... the man is never going to change......NEVER! And the woman is going to change daily, weekly and sometimes hourly. Sorry girls, but we know that is true. So how do we expect to be the same twinkle-toed, dewey-eyed lovers we once were? WORK, WORK, WORK on it every day. Make the person you are with the most important thing in your life. Your children are your priority when they are little, but they will leave you some day to have their own life and they won't want you around as much any longer. Your mate is just that....your mate. That means you and your partner are a team that are meant to be together for as long as you live. You get what you give, so if you give less than you should, that is what you are going to get in return. Don't ever put them down in front of anyone else. You wouldn't like it if they use you to be the brunt of a joke, so don't do it to them. Don't complain about your partner to anyone elese either because your 'friend', who you have taken into your 'confidence' is usually telling their spouse and they will just 'have' to let your partner in on it somehow.
So, everyone just start to think of how you would like to be treated and start treating your spouse that way. You may not notice anything at first, but it will pay off in the very foreseeable furture. And after awhile, it will be the way you act normally and you may just get back some of those ten-thousand volts......well, maybe a hundred or so....
Good Luck to all you lovebirds out there.....
