Hi boys and girls. Hope everyone is doing well on this beautiful day. Today, Gommy wants to talk about having faith in knowing what we want in life. And the fear that develops when we think of changing anything in order to achieve whatever it is that we want.
Gommy read a quote by Usman Asif that said, "Fear is a darkroom, where negatives develop." That is so true when you think about it. We start out thinking about something we want, like maybe a new and exciting career and then we start that dreaded 'monkey-talk' and say to ourselves, 'Oh no, what if XYZ happens and it doesn't work out?....' or the thought that, 'I better stay right where I am because I don't know what I'll find somewhere else.' What this really translates into is a fear of change. We are creatures of habit and many of us don't like to go out of our comfort zones. We would rather loll around in our unfulfilled existence than to 'go for it'....
We choose to believe that we may go 'from the frying pan into the fire', rather than think we might actually be making a better life, career or place in the world for ourselves by the change. Why is that? Why is it so much easier to expect or accept the worst? We do have a 50/50 chance of it being the right decision, don't we???? We have to have faith sometimes, that things will turn out for the better every once in a while. Another quote that is applicable here is from Mary Morrissey. It states that, "You block your dream when you allow your fear to grow bigger than your faith." Another good morsel to help you 'change' the way you think about things.
If we can learn to change without the dread part always creeping in, we can adapt more easily to a variety of situations. I have heard people say they felt sorry for a certain person because they had gone to several different schools while they were growing up. But, if you look at the people who did have different experiences in life (for whatever reason)....they seem to have an easier time speaking with new people, making friends with new people, and they are usually well-adjusted adults who can carry on conversations with people who don't necessarily have to be just like them. I'd say that is a good asset and a learning tool that they developed by meeting new people and facing new situations.
When we over-worry, we tend to become 'numb-brained' (another of Gommy's technical terms)....that is to say we get frozen in the thoughts we keep telling ourselves. You know....the old deer in the headlight syndrome. If we could learn to relax about possible mistakes we may make....we might become more at ease about change the next time an opportunity comes up. And when we find that it wasn't the end of the world and we are still upright and taking in nourishment.....we may just begin to trust ourselves with future thoughts about what we want. And then we won't fear the thought that we might have to change a few things in order to fulfill the idea. Change can be 'life-changing' but it doesn't have to be 'life-ending'.
And for all you boys and girls who are 'stuck' in whatever it is you are stuck in, and are afraid to change something because of what someone else may think of it.....STOP that. You'd be very surprised to know how very little people actually think about you or what you are doing. Oh, they may make a snide remark about your choice....but deep down they wish they had the guts to change something in their lives.
So, do you want to stay in your safe little 'prison' just so someone who is talking junk about you anyway, thinks more of you? Not this Gommy. We all get to live one life....OUR OWN. If you want to give yours away.....it is yours to give....but do you really want to give something away that is so precious to someone who doesn't really care all that much about you in the first place? Gommy thought not.....
So, think about something you would like to change in your life. Make it something small at first. Take little, tiny steps....and then bigger ones, until you change something you wished you could. It could be as small as not eating after eight o'clock at night. That may be a biggie to some noshers who like to watch TV and eat....or you can try going home from work a different way. Just little changes and then build up to bigger changes. Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater though. We don't want a bunch of 'brain-numbing' 'deer in the headlight' peeps walking around wondering where the heck is my cheese.....That phrase is from a motivational book called "Who Moved my Cheese?"
The book, "Who Moved my Cheese?", is a parable for how change affects two little mice. The moral the book is trying to teach us is that: 1) "Change Happens= so keep the cheese moving 2) Anticipate Change= prepare and get ready for the cheese to move 3) Monitor the Change= Smell the cheese every once in a while to see if it is starting to smell 4) Adapt to Change Quickly= the quicker you let go of the old cheese, the sooner you can start enjoying the new cheese 5) Change! = Move with the Cheese 6) Enjoy the Change = Savor the taste of the new cheese, and finally 7) Be Ready for the next time to change quickly and enjoy it again and again = be willing to keep moving the cheese!
One of the little mice asks at one point, "What would you do if you weren't afraid?" Now that is a biggie. The simple answer to that question is that you leave fear behind. So my little mice friends....take a chance...move or change your cheese a little bit! You may just find that there is a plethora of cheeses out there that you have never tasted.....and there are some pretty good ones too. If you've only tasted Cheddar, Swiss or American...you are in for a treat when you get a taste of Gouda or Brie or............go on.......you can do it....Gommy is pulling for you! Hugs & Mush, Gommy
