Gommy was listening to someone recently talking about how this certain someone must have 'asked' for what happened in their life. Now Goms isn't a Rocket Scientist, but I would venture to say that this particular person didn't 'want' to be in the life position they were experiencing at this time in their life.
This person had lost their job and was forced to make some pretty drastic lifestyle changes. They had been humbled into asking for government assistance for the very food they were eating and for help in other areas of living day to day. They were also made to suffer all of the other embarrassments that come with being down on your luck. Did they ask for all that.......I think not.
The incident made Gommy start to think why someone would be so callous to the feelings of someone and their misfortunes. What Goms came up with is that when someone makes fun of someone losing their job, or having to receive assistance to get by with the daily necessities of life....it can only be that the insensitive person must never had to face adversity themselves. When they can think....."Oh, I or my husband/wife would never be downsized.....because we are just too wonderful...", or "That person must be stupid and made a lot of unwise choices with their finances." and so they think, "I am too smart to ever make an unwise decision about MY finances." Watch out people.....Karma is a Charma.....sometimes we are given tests and lessons in our lives so we may experience them as well. It is how you handle adversity that shows your true mettle.
What it really reveals about a person who would be that unkind is that they have never been struck with a downside in their life. The people who do have to suffer humiliation and the admission that they have made mistakes, tend to be much kinder, empathetic and better people for the adversity they have experienced.
It is very easy to be pompous when everything is going great guns and you have prosperity in your corner. It isn't so much fun when the tables turn and everything seems to go bottom up. It is always in the hardest times of our lives that we tend to grow. We usually become spiritual as we search for answers to why. We realize we are the very same people we were when we 'had it all' as when we no longer have a 'pot or a window to throw it out of"....
So the lesson for today from Gommy is................be kind to people who are less fortunate than you. Compassion and empathy are rather nice character traits to try to emulate. We don't always have control of what happens in our lives and when someone seems to need help or a shoulder.....be that magnanimous person who has the ability to listen or help. Have a Blessed day boys and girls and remember to be grateful for whatever you do have....be it a whole bunch or a little, itty bitty. ((*.*))
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Friday, May 7, 2010
Happy Mother's Day
This weekend is Mother's Day. Gommys thinks we should all appreciate our mothers every day and not just one weekend a year! But we'll take a day..... rather than no day at all.
Motherhood is the hardest job in the world and it can also the most rewarding job in the world. Stay at home moms may feel less appreciated than the moms who work outside of the home. It's very hard to be a mom and have to work outside of the home, but try staying home every single day with the kids and see how much fun that is! Yes, we love our children, but when there is no 'me' time, it can get on your nerves once in a while.
It is impossible to be the 'perfect' mom, but when people think you have it made to just stay at home every day, it really is a disservice to the mom who does all she does every single day of every single year until the children are raised. And then what??? When the kids are grown and out of the home, where is this mom supposed to pick up her life without the identity of "MOM"? She is longer 'needed' and it is really hard to just stop 'mothering' after doing it for so many years. The transition from mothering to just 'being mom' is very hard for some moms. That can cause heartache and many arguments between moms and their grown children. It is a wise mom who knows when to stop 'mothering' and when to become just the 'mom'.
The stay at home mom should never be made to feel 'less than' just because she doesn't go off to work. It is true that in today's economy, it is a luxury to be able to stay at home with your children....but it isn't all making cookies and coloring books for the mom who does stay home. The mom who goes out to work, still has lunch with other adults and has time to listen to music (grown-up music, that is) on her way to and from work. She has interesting things to talk with her husband about when he gets home, besides which friend came over for a play date. And the days when things just aren't going as planned, it is up to the stay at home Mom to deal with the children, the service repair man, the broken air conditioning, and anything else that can go wrong that does go wrong on certain days. And then there is the guilt that stay at home moms feel about wanting to get back to the careers they have given up to stay at home. Then, Dad sometimes feels he isn't getting all the attention he feels he deserves. But to be honest, how much is left of mom to be a sexy siren at the end of the day? Poor mom just can't win.
Gommy is by no means dissing the mom who works outside the home. Gommy know this mom doesn't have an easy time of it either . She has to get her family and herself ready each day with breakfast, lunch preparations, clean-up, sports activities and doctor and dentist appointments, her own work schedule, on and on and etc. And heaven forbid one of the kids is sick....what do you do with a sick child when you have career demands? It never seems to fall on Dad. Is Dad ever expected to stay at home at these times? I think this may happen rarely and it certainly doesn't seem to be the norm. Moms in general are heroines and don't nearly get the thanks they deserve.
And isn't it usually the Mom who gets blamed for anything that went wrong in the upbringing of the children? Mom is the one who is stereotyped as the one who makes her grown children need to see a psychiatrist.....For heaven's sake.....she was doing it all and giving her all and she may have made a mistake or two during all those years she was trying to do her best...give her a break.
As to those mothers who are no longer with us. We realize just how much we miss our mothers with every passing year we are without them. We can no longer just pick up the phone to say hello and 'I love you". We can't ask them what that childhood friend's name is that we just aren't able to recall, or that memory about your childhood that is a bit fuzzy and you wish mom could remind you about it. She was the one you could always ask advice from and know she was on your side each and every time. Because your mother is just about the best friend you could ever have or will ever have in your lifetime. She is the one person you can tell anything to and she will still love you......scabs, scars, faults and all....she is the one who has unconditional love for you....NO MATTER WHAT!! Gommy has often said that even mothers of serial killers love them. That is the kind of love you get from your mother.
So Moms out there and Moms not with us any more.....we love you and we appreciate all you did and all you do for us. We may not say it often enough.....but you are our heroine. You should be proud of being "the everything in the world we could ever need" to make our lives run smoother and who made us always feel loved. Thanks for being the taxi driver, the tutor, the nursemaid, the teacher, the cook, the maid, the confidant, and when we got older.....our BEST FRIEND. I love and miss you to my MOM......and to all the other moms out there....Gommy hopes you have a very special and wonderful Mother's Day...Hugs, Gommy
Motherhood is the hardest job in the world and it can also the most rewarding job in the world. Stay at home moms may feel less appreciated than the moms who work outside of the home. It's very hard to be a mom and have to work outside of the home, but try staying home every single day with the kids and see how much fun that is! Yes, we love our children, but when there is no 'me' time, it can get on your nerves once in a while.
It is impossible to be the 'perfect' mom, but when people think you have it made to just stay at home every day, it really is a disservice to the mom who does all she does every single day of every single year until the children are raised. And then what??? When the kids are grown and out of the home, where is this mom supposed to pick up her life without the identity of "MOM"? She is longer 'needed' and it is really hard to just stop 'mothering' after doing it for so many years. The transition from mothering to just 'being mom' is very hard for some moms. That can cause heartache and many arguments between moms and their grown children. It is a wise mom who knows when to stop 'mothering' and when to become just the 'mom'.
The stay at home mom should never be made to feel 'less than' just because she doesn't go off to work. It is true that in today's economy, it is a luxury to be able to stay at home with your children....but it isn't all making cookies and coloring books for the mom who does stay home. The mom who goes out to work, still has lunch with other adults and has time to listen to music (grown-up music, that is) on her way to and from work. She has interesting things to talk with her husband about when he gets home, besides which friend came over for a play date. And the days when things just aren't going as planned, it is up to the stay at home Mom to deal with the children, the service repair man, the broken air conditioning, and anything else that can go wrong that does go wrong on certain days. And then there is the guilt that stay at home moms feel about wanting to get back to the careers they have given up to stay at home. Then, Dad sometimes feels he isn't getting all the attention he feels he deserves. But to be honest, how much is left of mom to be a sexy siren at the end of the day? Poor mom just can't win.
Gommy is by no means dissing the mom who works outside the home. Gommy know this mom doesn't have an easy time of it either . She has to get her family and herself ready each day with breakfast, lunch preparations, clean-up, sports activities and doctor and dentist appointments, her own work schedule, on and on and etc. And heaven forbid one of the kids is sick....what do you do with a sick child when you have career demands? It never seems to fall on Dad. Is Dad ever expected to stay at home at these times? I think this may happen rarely and it certainly doesn't seem to be the norm. Moms in general are heroines and don't nearly get the thanks they deserve.
And isn't it usually the Mom who gets blamed for anything that went wrong in the upbringing of the children? Mom is the one who is stereotyped as the one who makes her grown children need to see a psychiatrist.....For heaven's sake.....she was doing it all and giving her all and she may have made a mistake or two during all those years she was trying to do her best...give her a break.
As to those mothers who are no longer with us. We realize just how much we miss our mothers with every passing year we are without them. We can no longer just pick up the phone to say hello and 'I love you". We can't ask them what that childhood friend's name is that we just aren't able to recall, or that memory about your childhood that is a bit fuzzy and you wish mom could remind you about it. She was the one you could always ask advice from and know she was on your side each and every time. Because your mother is just about the best friend you could ever have or will ever have in your lifetime. She is the one person you can tell anything to and she will still love you......scabs, scars, faults and all....she is the one who has unconditional love for you....NO MATTER WHAT!! Gommy has often said that even mothers of serial killers love them. That is the kind of love you get from your mother.
So Moms out there and Moms not with us any more.....we love you and we appreciate all you did and all you do for us. We may not say it often enough.....but you are our heroine. You should be proud of being "the everything in the world we could ever need" to make our lives run smoother and who made us always feel loved. Thanks for being the taxi driver, the tutor, the nursemaid, the teacher, the cook, the maid, the confidant, and when we got older.....our BEST FRIEND. I love and miss you to my MOM......and to all the other moms out there....Gommy hopes you have a very special and wonderful Mother's Day...Hugs, Gommy
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Don't Judge a Book by It's Cover!
Just when Gommy thought the moving bug was over and finished for Grandpa and me.....another move was looming in our future. The whole experience has brought to mind the adage, "You can't judge a book by it's cover". If you were to look at the view from our last apartment on the intracoastal, you would think, "Why in the world would they ever want to move from that Paradise!!!" Wellllll, let Goms tell you why.
When Grandpa and I moved in to our beautiful little beach bungalow, we thought that we had moved for the very last time. The view was gorgeous, it was only a block from the beach and it was just what we had envisioned living in for our 'Golden Years.' Then, the wacka-doodles started showing up and making themselves evident. There was late night prowlings and noises so you couldn't sleep, there were fights loud enough to have the police called in the wee hours of the night, the palmetto bugs were multiplying faster than rabbits ( no matter how much bug spray was used and having to be inhaled by us!), there was the problem with parking, i.e. if it rained, you would have to wade to your car in ankle deep run off water, to go to work. Then, just when it looked like the loonies upstairs from us were gone (evicted actually) and the landlord promised (apparently through her lying teeth) that she would 'screen' the next tenants....a REAL and certifiable looney-tunes moved in the very same upstairs apartment. This time, she was an alcoholic who had many personality disorders and reminded Goms of the movie 'Sybil'. Yikes.....what happened to our 'Golden Years'? There seemed to be some tarnishing of the 'gold' going on for sure.....
Grandpa works VERY hard and he needs his rest to be able to do his very demanding job as well as he does....so we started looking for another place to live. In the meantime, Grandpa has been so blessed with the many tournaments he has booked at his work, that he needed a 'lovely assistant' to help him in the daily details and correspondence that he was becoming inundated and covered up with. Voila'...Gommy to the rescue. So, Grandpas' place of work hired Gommy to be Grandpas' assistant. Perfect! No more working late nights, weekends and holidays. And it turns out, that we found an apartment right behind the golf course and we can WALK to work. How perfect is that?
Yes, we will miss the beach being so close and Grandpa will miss having his cigar while he sat on the dock of the intracoastal, while he watched how the 'other people live' going by on their Yachts.....but the peace and quiet and the closeness to our work well make up for it. And we can always drive the nine miles to the beach now can't we.....no whining here. And as an added bonus, the apartment complex has a jacuzzi that Grandpa just loves to sit in after a hard days work.
So, just remember, that even though the grass isn't always greener on the other side, sometimes a picturesque setting isn't always as serene as it appears to others, on the side you are on either. The same holds true for people. You may think that a certain person is all put together and you wish you were more like them or their family, but more often, the truth of the matter is, they are just holding on by the skin of their teeth and you are probably much better off than they are. That is the old 'book-cover' analogy again. Don't automatically assume someone is better, prettier, richer, happier, etc. than you. They may just be acting, emphasis on 'acting' as if they were better off. And the more someone 'tries' to 'act' as if they are better than you....that is a pretty good indicator that they probably are not.
So, here's to Grandpa and Goms moving to another home and hoping this will be the very last move....AGAIN! From Gommy's lips to God's ears.....In the meantime, we will just enjoy our new place and hope the wacka-doodles don't show up again. Have a great day boys and girls....Be happy and be true to yourselves. Hugs and Mush....Goms
When Grandpa and I moved in to our beautiful little beach bungalow, we thought that we had moved for the very last time. The view was gorgeous, it was only a block from the beach and it was just what we had envisioned living in for our 'Golden Years.' Then, the wacka-doodles started showing up and making themselves evident. There was late night prowlings and noises so you couldn't sleep, there were fights loud enough to have the police called in the wee hours of the night, the palmetto bugs were multiplying faster than rabbits ( no matter how much bug spray was used and having to be inhaled by us!), there was the problem with parking, i.e. if it rained, you would have to wade to your car in ankle deep run off water, to go to work. Then, just when it looked like the loonies upstairs from us were gone (evicted actually) and the landlord promised (apparently through her lying teeth) that she would 'screen' the next tenants....a REAL and certifiable looney-tunes moved in the very same upstairs apartment. This time, she was an alcoholic who had many personality disorders and reminded Goms of the movie 'Sybil'. Yikes.....what happened to our 'Golden Years'? There seemed to be some tarnishing of the 'gold' going on for sure.....
Grandpa works VERY hard and he needs his rest to be able to do his very demanding job as well as he does....so we started looking for another place to live. In the meantime, Grandpa has been so blessed with the many tournaments he has booked at his work, that he needed a 'lovely assistant' to help him in the daily details and correspondence that he was becoming inundated and covered up with. Voila'...Gommy to the rescue. So, Grandpas' place of work hired Gommy to be Grandpas' assistant. Perfect! No more working late nights, weekends and holidays. And it turns out, that we found an apartment right behind the golf course and we can WALK to work. How perfect is that?
Yes, we will miss the beach being so close and Grandpa will miss having his cigar while he sat on the dock of the intracoastal, while he watched how the 'other people live' going by on their Yachts.....but the peace and quiet and the closeness to our work well make up for it. And we can always drive the nine miles to the beach now can't we.....no whining here. And as an added bonus, the apartment complex has a jacuzzi that Grandpa just loves to sit in after a hard days work.
So, just remember, that even though the grass isn't always greener on the other side, sometimes a picturesque setting isn't always as serene as it appears to others, on the side you are on either. The same holds true for people. You may think that a certain person is all put together and you wish you were more like them or their family, but more often, the truth of the matter is, they are just holding on by the skin of their teeth and you are probably much better off than they are. That is the old 'book-cover' analogy again. Don't automatically assume someone is better, prettier, richer, happier, etc. than you. They may just be acting, emphasis on 'acting' as if they were better off. And the more someone 'tries' to 'act' as if they are better than you....that is a pretty good indicator that they probably are not.
So, here's to Grandpa and Goms moving to another home and hoping this will be the very last move....AGAIN! From Gommy's lips to God's ears.....In the meantime, we will just enjoy our new place and hope the wacka-doodles don't show up again. Have a great day boys and girls....Be happy and be true to yourselves. Hugs and Mush....Goms
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