Gommy sang that song along with the radio a zillion and one times as a young girl. But it wasn't until some age attached itself to this old 'till' did it make any sense. Goms thinks the words mean that what we all ultimately really want out of our life is to be loved.
Now we can feel that we are loved if we are accepted by people we care about. Or that we are respected for the life choices we have made or the successes we have accomplished. But that can also cause envy for some and we don't want that, do we? Or it can come in the form of the good feeling that comes from being with people who actually enjoy your company and who invite you to functions because they really want you there and it isn't because they feel it is a duty or it is socially expected. That good feeling we get when we can feel that someone truly enjoys being with us is so wonderful that we just can't get enough of being with that person or people.
Goms wonders why some people seem to 'get' or 'click' with other people and think they are just the best thing since sliced bread and others don't have the same reaction to the very same person. They can think this person is amazing, awesome, funny, great to spend time with......and other people don't see those same things at all in the very same person. Could it be that the old saying; "birds of a feather, flock together", means that the more you are like a person, the more fun it is to be around them? But then Goms has seen examples of people who are not like each other at all, and they seem to get along famously. Go figure!
Maybe jealousy comes into the process and that jealousy may be that we wish we were more like a certain person and that makes us not want to be around that person because we feel we don't measure up. Have you ever been around a person who you feel disapproves of you? You don't want to be around that person very much, do you? It is much more pleasant to be with people who like you and like your personality and your interests.
Or how about the person who has to control every single aspect of your relationship? That is a real drag. They never seem to see that they are expecting you to do what they want you to do, and all the while they never seem to want to do what you may wish to do. That sort of relationship never feels very good and doesn't get very far...for very understandable reasons!
But back to needing love. In the grand scheme of things, we all just need to feel appreciated. And being loved comes about as close to filling that need as any other emotion, bauble, food, drink, accomplishment or relationship with anything else that we may try to fill up on.
The thing to remember is, and here is the rub, you have to allow yourself to be loved. If you are an arms-length type of person....guess what.....you will have arms-length relationships. You have to take the chance of being hurt and being wrong and being unloved and just try to BE lovable. It really is the truth that 'whatever' you put out there is what you get back in return. It's just that easy folks......There's no argument that you can make to disagree. If you are cold....cold is what will come back to you. If you are selfish....people will show selfishness back to you. If you are spiteful.....well, you get the picture now don't you? Goms keeps harping on the same train of thought...KARMA IS A CHARMA. Reap and sow, reap and sow, reap and sow.........Can't get any clearer or simpler than that peeps.
Another way to look at love and being loved and needing love is that if we love, there is no room for the other nasty or undesirable emotions to come into play. You can't have two opposite emotions at work at the same time. You can't laugh AND cry at the same time, you can't be happy AND mad at the same time, and you can't love AND hate at the same time either. So maybe that is what the song meant.
So, if you want love in your life.....love others. If you want compassion...show compassion. If you want people to feel close to you.....quit being so hard to get close to. Think before you say things that will hurt people. Gommy has had a few life lessons with that one. But as long as we learn from our faux pas......it is not a lesson that was for nothing. And Goms really believes that we are given life lessons all the time. We just don't always 'pass' the lesson and graduate onto the next lesson. So, we keep making the same stupid mistake, over and over and over.......DUH!!!
Also, don't be so quick to strike out at people for doing something that you have done yourself. You know, the old 'Forest for the trees' scenario? Even the Bible says that whatever you want from others, you must give of it yourself....Remember the part about..."Do unto others".... ?
So, this week, try to think of how you are coming across to other people. You may find that if you look inward, you may just see that you can understand why other people find you to be a certain way. Edkhart Tolle says that if you take care of your 'inside you' your outside you and your world around you will take care of itself. Gommy thinks he just may have something there......Have a great week boys and girls. And practice being the way you want others to be to you. It was another very wise man, Gandhi, who said, "Be the change you want to see in the world." I think he was onto something too but nobody was listening. It's not too late though......it's never to late to change, if you need to, so you can feel the love that we all really want in our lives. Good luck and hugs and mush... Gommy
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Walk a Mile in Their Shoes
Gommy was listening to someone recently talking about how this certain someone must have 'asked' for what happened in their life. Now Goms isn't a Rocket Scientist, but I would venture to say that this particular person didn't 'want' to be in the life position they were experiencing at this time in their life.
This person had lost their job and was forced to make some pretty drastic lifestyle changes. They had been humbled into asking for government assistance for the very food they were eating and for help in other areas of living day to day. They were also made to suffer all of the other embarrassments that come with being down on your luck. Did they ask for all that.......I think not.
The incident made Gommy start to think why someone would be so callous to the feelings of someone and their misfortunes. What Goms came up with is that when someone makes fun of someone losing their job, or having to receive assistance to get by with the daily necessities of life....it can only be that the insensitive person must never had to face adversity themselves. When they can think....."Oh, I or my husband/wife would never be downsized.....because we are just too wonderful...", or "That person must be stupid and made a lot of unwise choices with their finances." and so they think, "I am too smart to ever make an unwise decision about MY finances." Watch out people.....Karma is a Charma.....sometimes we are given tests and lessons in our lives so we may experience them as well. It is how you handle adversity that shows your true mettle.
What it really reveals about a person who would be that unkind is that they have never been struck with a downside in their life. The people who do have to suffer humiliation and the admission that they have made mistakes, tend to be much kinder, empathetic and better people for the adversity they have experienced.
It is very easy to be pompous when everything is going great guns and you have prosperity in your corner. It isn't so much fun when the tables turn and everything seems to go bottom up. It is always in the hardest times of our lives that we tend to grow. We usually become spiritual as we search for answers to why. We realize we are the very same people we were when we 'had it all' as when we no longer have a 'pot or a window to throw it out of"....
So the lesson for today from Gommy is................be kind to people who are less fortunate than you. Compassion and empathy are rather nice character traits to try to emulate. We don't always have control of what happens in our lives and when someone seems to need help or a shoulder.....be that magnanimous person who has the ability to listen or help. Have a Blessed day boys and girls and remember to be grateful for whatever you do have....be it a whole bunch or a little, itty bitty. ((*.*))
This person had lost their job and was forced to make some pretty drastic lifestyle changes. They had been humbled into asking for government assistance for the very food they were eating and for help in other areas of living day to day. They were also made to suffer all of the other embarrassments that come with being down on your luck. Did they ask for all that.......I think not.
The incident made Gommy start to think why someone would be so callous to the feelings of someone and their misfortunes. What Goms came up with is that when someone makes fun of someone losing their job, or having to receive assistance to get by with the daily necessities of life....it can only be that the insensitive person must never had to face adversity themselves. When they can think....."Oh, I or my husband/wife would never be downsized.....because we are just too wonderful...", or "That person must be stupid and made a lot of unwise choices with their finances." and so they think, "I am too smart to ever make an unwise decision about MY finances." Watch out people.....Karma is a Charma.....sometimes we are given tests and lessons in our lives so we may experience them as well. It is how you handle adversity that shows your true mettle.
What it really reveals about a person who would be that unkind is that they have never been struck with a downside in their life. The people who do have to suffer humiliation and the admission that they have made mistakes, tend to be much kinder, empathetic and better people for the adversity they have experienced.
It is very easy to be pompous when everything is going great guns and you have prosperity in your corner. It isn't so much fun when the tables turn and everything seems to go bottom up. It is always in the hardest times of our lives that we tend to grow. We usually become spiritual as we search for answers to why. We realize we are the very same people we were when we 'had it all' as when we no longer have a 'pot or a window to throw it out of"....
So the lesson for today from Gommy is................be kind to people who are less fortunate than you. Compassion and empathy are rather nice character traits to try to emulate. We don't always have control of what happens in our lives and when someone seems to need help or a shoulder.....be that magnanimous person who has the ability to listen or help. Have a Blessed day boys and girls and remember to be grateful for whatever you do have....be it a whole bunch or a little, itty bitty. ((*.*))
Friday, May 7, 2010
Happy Mother's Day
This weekend is Mother's Day. Gommys thinks we should all appreciate our mothers every day and not just one weekend a year! But we'll take a day..... rather than no day at all.
Motherhood is the hardest job in the world and it can also the most rewarding job in the world. Stay at home moms may feel less appreciated than the moms who work outside of the home. It's very hard to be a mom and have to work outside of the home, but try staying home every single day with the kids and see how much fun that is! Yes, we love our children, but when there is no 'me' time, it can get on your nerves once in a while.
It is impossible to be the 'perfect' mom, but when people think you have it made to just stay at home every day, it really is a disservice to the mom who does all she does every single day of every single year until the children are raised. And then what??? When the kids are grown and out of the home, where is this mom supposed to pick up her life without the identity of "MOM"? She is longer 'needed' and it is really hard to just stop 'mothering' after doing it for so many years. The transition from mothering to just 'being mom' is very hard for some moms. That can cause heartache and many arguments between moms and their grown children. It is a wise mom who knows when to stop 'mothering' and when to become just the 'mom'.
The stay at home mom should never be made to feel 'less than' just because she doesn't go off to work. It is true that in today's economy, it is a luxury to be able to stay at home with your children....but it isn't all making cookies and coloring books for the mom who does stay home. The mom who goes out to work, still has lunch with other adults and has time to listen to music (grown-up music, that is) on her way to and from work. She has interesting things to talk with her husband about when he gets home, besides which friend came over for a play date. And the days when things just aren't going as planned, it is up to the stay at home Mom to deal with the children, the service repair man, the broken air conditioning, and anything else that can go wrong that does go wrong on certain days. And then there is the guilt that stay at home moms feel about wanting to get back to the careers they have given up to stay at home. Then, Dad sometimes feels he isn't getting all the attention he feels he deserves. But to be honest, how much is left of mom to be a sexy siren at the end of the day? Poor mom just can't win.
Gommy is by no means dissing the mom who works outside the home. Gommy know this mom doesn't have an easy time of it either . She has to get her family and herself ready each day with breakfast, lunch preparations, clean-up, sports activities and doctor and dentist appointments, her own work schedule, on and on and etc. And heaven forbid one of the kids is sick....what do you do with a sick child when you have career demands? It never seems to fall on Dad. Is Dad ever expected to stay at home at these times? I think this may happen rarely and it certainly doesn't seem to be the norm. Moms in general are heroines and don't nearly get the thanks they deserve.
And isn't it usually the Mom who gets blamed for anything that went wrong in the upbringing of the children? Mom is the one who is stereotyped as the one who makes her grown children need to see a psychiatrist.....For heaven's sake.....she was doing it all and giving her all and she may have made a mistake or two during all those years she was trying to do her best...give her a break.
As to those mothers who are no longer with us. We realize just how much we miss our mothers with every passing year we are without them. We can no longer just pick up the phone to say hello and 'I love you". We can't ask them what that childhood friend's name is that we just aren't able to recall, or that memory about your childhood that is a bit fuzzy and you wish mom could remind you about it. She was the one you could always ask advice from and know she was on your side each and every time. Because your mother is just about the best friend you could ever have or will ever have in your lifetime. She is the one person you can tell anything to and she will still love you......scabs, scars, faults and all....she is the one who has unconditional love for you....NO MATTER WHAT!! Gommy has often said that even mothers of serial killers love them. That is the kind of love you get from your mother.
So Moms out there and Moms not with us any more.....we love you and we appreciate all you did and all you do for us. We may not say it often enough.....but you are our heroine. You should be proud of being "the everything in the world we could ever need" to make our lives run smoother and who made us always feel loved. Thanks for being the taxi driver, the tutor, the nursemaid, the teacher, the cook, the maid, the confidant, and when we got older.....our BEST FRIEND. I love and miss you to my MOM......and to all the other moms out there....Gommy hopes you have a very special and wonderful Mother's Day...Hugs, Gommy
Motherhood is the hardest job in the world and it can also the most rewarding job in the world. Stay at home moms may feel less appreciated than the moms who work outside of the home. It's very hard to be a mom and have to work outside of the home, but try staying home every single day with the kids and see how much fun that is! Yes, we love our children, but when there is no 'me' time, it can get on your nerves once in a while.
It is impossible to be the 'perfect' mom, but when people think you have it made to just stay at home every day, it really is a disservice to the mom who does all she does every single day of every single year until the children are raised. And then what??? When the kids are grown and out of the home, where is this mom supposed to pick up her life without the identity of "MOM"? She is longer 'needed' and it is really hard to just stop 'mothering' after doing it for so many years. The transition from mothering to just 'being mom' is very hard for some moms. That can cause heartache and many arguments between moms and their grown children. It is a wise mom who knows when to stop 'mothering' and when to become just the 'mom'.
The stay at home mom should never be made to feel 'less than' just because she doesn't go off to work. It is true that in today's economy, it is a luxury to be able to stay at home with your children....but it isn't all making cookies and coloring books for the mom who does stay home. The mom who goes out to work, still has lunch with other adults and has time to listen to music (grown-up music, that is) on her way to and from work. She has interesting things to talk with her husband about when he gets home, besides which friend came over for a play date. And the days when things just aren't going as planned, it is up to the stay at home Mom to deal with the children, the service repair man, the broken air conditioning, and anything else that can go wrong that does go wrong on certain days. And then there is the guilt that stay at home moms feel about wanting to get back to the careers they have given up to stay at home. Then, Dad sometimes feels he isn't getting all the attention he feels he deserves. But to be honest, how much is left of mom to be a sexy siren at the end of the day? Poor mom just can't win.
Gommy is by no means dissing the mom who works outside the home. Gommy know this mom doesn't have an easy time of it either . She has to get her family and herself ready each day with breakfast, lunch preparations, clean-up, sports activities and doctor and dentist appointments, her own work schedule, on and on and etc. And heaven forbid one of the kids is sick....what do you do with a sick child when you have career demands? It never seems to fall on Dad. Is Dad ever expected to stay at home at these times? I think this may happen rarely and it certainly doesn't seem to be the norm. Moms in general are heroines and don't nearly get the thanks they deserve.
And isn't it usually the Mom who gets blamed for anything that went wrong in the upbringing of the children? Mom is the one who is stereotyped as the one who makes her grown children need to see a psychiatrist.....For heaven's sake.....she was doing it all and giving her all and she may have made a mistake or two during all those years she was trying to do her best...give her a break.
As to those mothers who are no longer with us. We realize just how much we miss our mothers with every passing year we are without them. We can no longer just pick up the phone to say hello and 'I love you". We can't ask them what that childhood friend's name is that we just aren't able to recall, or that memory about your childhood that is a bit fuzzy and you wish mom could remind you about it. She was the one you could always ask advice from and know she was on your side each and every time. Because your mother is just about the best friend you could ever have or will ever have in your lifetime. She is the one person you can tell anything to and she will still love you......scabs, scars, faults and all....she is the one who has unconditional love for you....NO MATTER WHAT!! Gommy has often said that even mothers of serial killers love them. That is the kind of love you get from your mother.
So Moms out there and Moms not with us any more.....we love you and we appreciate all you did and all you do for us. We may not say it often enough.....but you are our heroine. You should be proud of being "the everything in the world we could ever need" to make our lives run smoother and who made us always feel loved. Thanks for being the taxi driver, the tutor, the nursemaid, the teacher, the cook, the maid, the confidant, and when we got older.....our BEST FRIEND. I love and miss you to my MOM......and to all the other moms out there....Gommy hopes you have a very special and wonderful Mother's Day...Hugs, Gommy
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Don't Judge a Book by It's Cover!
Just when Gommy thought the moving bug was over and finished for Grandpa and me.....another move was looming in our future. The whole experience has brought to mind the adage, "You can't judge a book by it's cover". If you were to look at the view from our last apartment on the intracoastal, you would think, "Why in the world would they ever want to move from that Paradise!!!" Wellllll, let Goms tell you why.
When Grandpa and I moved in to our beautiful little beach bungalow, we thought that we had moved for the very last time. The view was gorgeous, it was only a block from the beach and it was just what we had envisioned living in for our 'Golden Years.' Then, the wacka-doodles started showing up and making themselves evident. There was late night prowlings and noises so you couldn't sleep, there were fights loud enough to have the police called in the wee hours of the night, the palmetto bugs were multiplying faster than rabbits ( no matter how much bug spray was used and having to be inhaled by us!), there was the problem with parking, i.e. if it rained, you would have to wade to your car in ankle deep run off water, to go to work. Then, just when it looked like the loonies upstairs from us were gone (evicted actually) and the landlord promised (apparently through her lying teeth) that she would 'screen' the next tenants....a REAL and certifiable looney-tunes moved in the very same upstairs apartment. This time, she was an alcoholic who had many personality disorders and reminded Goms of the movie 'Sybil'. Yikes.....what happened to our 'Golden Years'? There seemed to be some tarnishing of the 'gold' going on for sure.....
Grandpa works VERY hard and he needs his rest to be able to do his very demanding job as well as he does....so we started looking for another place to live. In the meantime, Grandpa has been so blessed with the many tournaments he has booked at his work, that he needed a 'lovely assistant' to help him in the daily details and correspondence that he was becoming inundated and covered up with. Voila'...Gommy to the rescue. So, Grandpas' place of work hired Gommy to be Grandpas' assistant. Perfect! No more working late nights, weekends and holidays. And it turns out, that we found an apartment right behind the golf course and we can WALK to work. How perfect is that?
Yes, we will miss the beach being so close and Grandpa will miss having his cigar while he sat on the dock of the intracoastal, while he watched how the 'other people live' going by on their Yachts.....but the peace and quiet and the closeness to our work well make up for it. And we can always drive the nine miles to the beach now can't we.....no whining here. And as an added bonus, the apartment complex has a jacuzzi that Grandpa just loves to sit in after a hard days work.
So, just remember, that even though the grass isn't always greener on the other side, sometimes a picturesque setting isn't always as serene as it appears to others, on the side you are on either. The same holds true for people. You may think that a certain person is all put together and you wish you were more like them or their family, but more often, the truth of the matter is, they are just holding on by the skin of their teeth and you are probably much better off than they are. That is the old 'book-cover' analogy again. Don't automatically assume someone is better, prettier, richer, happier, etc. than you. They may just be acting, emphasis on 'acting' as if they were better off. And the more someone 'tries' to 'act' as if they are better than you....that is a pretty good indicator that they probably are not.
So, here's to Grandpa and Goms moving to another home and hoping this will be the very last move....AGAIN! From Gommy's lips to God's ears.....In the meantime, we will just enjoy our new place and hope the wacka-doodles don't show up again. Have a great day boys and girls....Be happy and be true to yourselves. Hugs and Mush....Goms
When Grandpa and I moved in to our beautiful little beach bungalow, we thought that we had moved for the very last time. The view was gorgeous, it was only a block from the beach and it was just what we had envisioned living in for our 'Golden Years.' Then, the wacka-doodles started showing up and making themselves evident. There was late night prowlings and noises so you couldn't sleep, there were fights loud enough to have the police called in the wee hours of the night, the palmetto bugs were multiplying faster than rabbits ( no matter how much bug spray was used and having to be inhaled by us!), there was the problem with parking, i.e. if it rained, you would have to wade to your car in ankle deep run off water, to go to work. Then, just when it looked like the loonies upstairs from us were gone (evicted actually) and the landlord promised (apparently through her lying teeth) that she would 'screen' the next tenants....a REAL and certifiable looney-tunes moved in the very same upstairs apartment. This time, she was an alcoholic who had many personality disorders and reminded Goms of the movie 'Sybil'. Yikes.....what happened to our 'Golden Years'? There seemed to be some tarnishing of the 'gold' going on for sure.....
Grandpa works VERY hard and he needs his rest to be able to do his very demanding job as well as he does....so we started looking for another place to live. In the meantime, Grandpa has been so blessed with the many tournaments he has booked at his work, that he needed a 'lovely assistant' to help him in the daily details and correspondence that he was becoming inundated and covered up with. Voila'...Gommy to the rescue. So, Grandpas' place of work hired Gommy to be Grandpas' assistant. Perfect! No more working late nights, weekends and holidays. And it turns out, that we found an apartment right behind the golf course and we can WALK to work. How perfect is that?
Yes, we will miss the beach being so close and Grandpa will miss having his cigar while he sat on the dock of the intracoastal, while he watched how the 'other people live' going by on their Yachts.....but the peace and quiet and the closeness to our work well make up for it. And we can always drive the nine miles to the beach now can't we.....no whining here. And as an added bonus, the apartment complex has a jacuzzi that Grandpa just loves to sit in after a hard days work.
So, just remember, that even though the grass isn't always greener on the other side, sometimes a picturesque setting isn't always as serene as it appears to others, on the side you are on either. The same holds true for people. You may think that a certain person is all put together and you wish you were more like them or their family, but more often, the truth of the matter is, they are just holding on by the skin of their teeth and you are probably much better off than they are. That is the old 'book-cover' analogy again. Don't automatically assume someone is better, prettier, richer, happier, etc. than you. They may just be acting, emphasis on 'acting' as if they were better off. And the more someone 'tries' to 'act' as if they are better than you....that is a pretty good indicator that they probably are not.
So, here's to Grandpa and Goms moving to another home and hoping this will be the very last move....AGAIN! From Gommy's lips to God's ears.....In the meantime, we will just enjoy our new place and hope the wacka-doodles don't show up again. Have a great day boys and girls....Be happy and be true to yourselves. Hugs and Mush....Goms
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Trust or not to Trust
Gommy has found that we are never too old to learn.....I just hope the saying, "You can't teach an old Gommy new tricks" doesn't apply. It never ceases to amaze Goms how some people can be so deceitful and how other people cannot see through them. Goms seems to have the curse of seeing through the most cunning or most blatant fake and it causes Goms' stomach to turn at times.
Have you ever noticed how people act differently depending who is around? Like, they act all 'righty-tighty' when the boss is around and don't give a minutes worth of work for the poor boss when the bosses aren't around. I guess that should fall under the category of, "Shame on the boss for not checking up on the slouches!".
Or they act as if they wouldn't say a mean thing about anyone and they are the exact ones you should never turn your back on. My father used to say, "A leopard doesn't change it's spots.", so if you wait and watch, you can usually 'catch' someone with their true personality coming out at inappropriate times.
Then there is the person who 'says' they are a friend of someone but doesn't truly give a good whip about that 'friend' because they tell you all sorts of things about the 'friend' and the 'friends' family or the 'friends' husband, that if it gets out, could ruin the friend her family and her marriage.
Goms has found that the reason most people are willing to make others look bad, just so they can make themselves look better, is that they don't have good self-esteem themselves, so they try to act like they know all the 'dirt' on someone and they tell it to make it look as if they have the ideal life. NOT....It is actually just the opposite. They have a miserable life and just want some company. Hence the sage adage..."Misery loves company."
People who feel inferior in their intelligence are most often the ones who are the loudest, the brashest, and are mean in their everyday lives. They just can't live with anyone else being happy, so they just stir the pot and try to make everyone else miserable. How sad.
But the good thing, is that we are in control of allowing or not allowing the evil ones to ruin your day your life or your family. Just stay away from them and let time show the type of person they are. They can't hide forever and it is only a matter of time before their true colors show.
Always try to remember that there is usually more than one side to a story. Try to figure out what motives are involved when someone is trying to manipulate a situation. You will usually find that the person who is the manipulator has a hidden agenda. Mostly, it is to cover up their own insecurities and make people think they are all that and a bag of chips.
The worse kind of person in Goms' book is the one that stabs you in the back just to stay on the right side of someone else. Like the saying...."Knowing which side of your bread is buttered on." But remember that you don't have to be a turncoat to stay on someones' good side. Saying nothing is better than betrayal. You should want to do what is right and be able to look yourself in the mirror each day.
So peeps, please stay true to yourself and to your friends and family. Sadly, it is becoming a lost character trait anymore. Good character is something that cannot be bought. It is earned and it only takes a lapse in judgement to lose it and it is very hard to regain.
Have a great day and keep working on being a good friend, family member, mother, father, child, citizen and just all around good person. It is a process and well worth the effort.
Have you ever noticed how people act differently depending who is around? Like, they act all 'righty-tighty' when the boss is around and don't give a minutes worth of work for the poor boss when the bosses aren't around. I guess that should fall under the category of, "Shame on the boss for not checking up on the slouches!".
Or they act as if they wouldn't say a mean thing about anyone and they are the exact ones you should never turn your back on. My father used to say, "A leopard doesn't change it's spots.", so if you wait and watch, you can usually 'catch' someone with their true personality coming out at inappropriate times.
Then there is the person who 'says' they are a friend of someone but doesn't truly give a good whip about that 'friend' because they tell you all sorts of things about the 'friend' and the 'friends' family or the 'friends' husband, that if it gets out, could ruin the friend her family and her marriage.
Goms has found that the reason most people are willing to make others look bad, just so they can make themselves look better, is that they don't have good self-esteem themselves, so they try to act like they know all the 'dirt' on someone and they tell it to make it look as if they have the ideal life. NOT....It is actually just the opposite. They have a miserable life and just want some company. Hence the sage adage..."Misery loves company."
People who feel inferior in their intelligence are most often the ones who are the loudest, the brashest, and are mean in their everyday lives. They just can't live with anyone else being happy, so they just stir the pot and try to make everyone else miserable. How sad.
But the good thing, is that we are in control of allowing or not allowing the evil ones to ruin your day your life or your family. Just stay away from them and let time show the type of person they are. They can't hide forever and it is only a matter of time before their true colors show.
Always try to remember that there is usually more than one side to a story. Try to figure out what motives are involved when someone is trying to manipulate a situation. You will usually find that the person who is the manipulator has a hidden agenda. Mostly, it is to cover up their own insecurities and make people think they are all that and a bag of chips.
The worse kind of person in Goms' book is the one that stabs you in the back just to stay on the right side of someone else. Like the saying...."Knowing which side of your bread is buttered on." But remember that you don't have to be a turncoat to stay on someones' good side. Saying nothing is better than betrayal. You should want to do what is right and be able to look yourself in the mirror each day.
So peeps, please stay true to yourself and to your friends and family. Sadly, it is becoming a lost character trait anymore. Good character is something that cannot be bought. It is earned and it only takes a lapse in judgement to lose it and it is very hard to regain.
Have a great day and keep working on being a good friend, family member, mother, father, child, citizen and just all around good person. It is a process and well worth the effort.
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Easter 2010
Happy Easter to all those who celebrate this holiday and to everyone else...hello! Goms wrote about new beginnings last week and Easter time is the epitome of new beginnings.....figuratively and in reality.
Gommy's life started a new beginning today too. Today was the first day of a new job and lifestyle change for Grandpa and me. No more weekends, nights or holidays to have to work!!! Isn't that marvelous???
It boggles the mind when Goms thinks about how for many years, while growing up, nothing much ever happened that was very different in Goms' life and Gom's comfort zone was in the range of about a 20 mile radius. Then....BOOM....in the next part of Gom's life there were several moves, in and out of the state, and all over the place. I'm trying to count how many moves there actually were....hmmmmm......let's see...there were at least 10 moves into different areas and different homes. Geesh....it really is amazing how our lives change and how very little we have to say about those changes. Yes, we can refuse to move, or whatever the situation may be, but Goms thinks everything happens and unfolds exactly the way it is supposed to.
The older one gets, the clearer it becomes that we are all just actors in the play of life. If you look back on your life, you will see that even if you struggled with something, lost someone, were greatly disappointed in love, changed careers, and so on.... you really didn't see most of it coming and you still came out the other end and you are still breathing. We lose touch with people, even relatives, we have different likes and dislikes as we mature....we have children, raise them and then they move on with their own life and have children of their own. When you are raising your children, you could never imagine that one day, they wouldn't need you any longer. If you are totally wrapped up in the 'identity' of being a mother or father and even though you will always be the mother or father.... you no longer have to 'mother' or 'father' any longer...you may feel lost and not know what your role in life is without that role identity. The well adjusted person is the one that realizes that their 'role' is no longer necessary and finds other ways to fill up their life.
Although change may seem unsettling and may seem negative on the surface, you may find that the change is actually making space for something good in your life. Even if there is a period of uncertainty and fear, you must learn to live with the uncertainty and try to enjoy the excitement of something new. The Roman philosopher Tacitus said that "the desire for safety stands against every great and noble enterprise." Eckhart Tolle says that " if uncertainty is unacceptable to you, it turns into fear. If it is perfectly acceptable, it turns into increased aliveness, alertness and creativity."
So Gommy's wish for all you boys and girls this Springtime is to find a new something.....anything......and even if it scares you....do it....you may just find that it is the exact thing that will make you a happier you! Taking a 'Leap of Faith' involves believing there will be a net there when you do leap!!!! Hugs and Mush...Gommy
Gommy's life started a new beginning today too. Today was the first day of a new job and lifestyle change for Grandpa and me. No more weekends, nights or holidays to have to work!!! Isn't that marvelous???
It boggles the mind when Goms thinks about how for many years, while growing up, nothing much ever happened that was very different in Goms' life and Gom's comfort zone was in the range of about a 20 mile radius. Then....BOOM....in the next part of Gom's life there were several moves, in and out of the state, and all over the place. I'm trying to count how many moves there actually were....hmmmmm......let's see...there were at least 10 moves into different areas and different homes. Geesh....it really is amazing how our lives change and how very little we have to say about those changes. Yes, we can refuse to move, or whatever the situation may be, but Goms thinks everything happens and unfolds exactly the way it is supposed to.
The older one gets, the clearer it becomes that we are all just actors in the play of life. If you look back on your life, you will see that even if you struggled with something, lost someone, were greatly disappointed in love, changed careers, and so on.... you really didn't see most of it coming and you still came out the other end and you are still breathing. We lose touch with people, even relatives, we have different likes and dislikes as we mature....we have children, raise them and then they move on with their own life and have children of their own. When you are raising your children, you could never imagine that one day, they wouldn't need you any longer. If you are totally wrapped up in the 'identity' of being a mother or father and even though you will always be the mother or father.... you no longer have to 'mother' or 'father' any longer...you may feel lost and not know what your role in life is without that role identity. The well adjusted person is the one that realizes that their 'role' is no longer necessary and finds other ways to fill up their life.
Although change may seem unsettling and may seem negative on the surface, you may find that the change is actually making space for something good in your life. Even if there is a period of uncertainty and fear, you must learn to live with the uncertainty and try to enjoy the excitement of something new. The Roman philosopher Tacitus said that "the desire for safety stands against every great and noble enterprise." Eckhart Tolle says that " if uncertainty is unacceptable to you, it turns into fear. If it is perfectly acceptable, it turns into increased aliveness, alertness and creativity."
So Gommy's wish for all you boys and girls this Springtime is to find a new something.....anything......and even if it scares you....do it....you may just find that it is the exact thing that will make you a happier you! Taking a 'Leap of Faith' involves believing there will be a net there when you do leap!!!! Hugs and Mush...Gommy
Sunday, March 28, 2010
A New Beginning
Hello Boys and Girls and happy Palm Sunday to any Christian readers out there in blogland. To everyone else....just 'happy day' to you....
This is the last Sunday that Gommy will have to work on a Sunday. Hooray and hallelujah! Gommy and Grandpa Mike are pretty excited about a new development in our lives. Goms is going to be working as Grandpa's assistant, at the golf course where Grandpa works. We have been Blessed in that Grandpa has procured so much business in his job as Sales Director, that he needs someone to help with the mountainous details and paperwork that comes with all that business. Voile'.....Gommy to the rescue....But to be honest...it was really Grandpa to the rescue of Gommy. Now Gommy will not have to work nights or weekends or Holidays any longer and Grandpa and I will have a 'normal' life again with supper together and collaborating on the daily business tasks as we have done in the past when we owned our own golf course for ten years. The added bonus this time around though, is that we don't have to worry about the rest of the zillions of things you have to worry about as an owner. It is much less stressful to go out and 'get' the business. Grandpa can do that with his eyes closed and one hand tied behind his back. And Gommy is good at being 'behind the scenes' and doing all the crossing of the T's and dotting the I's for Grandpa. Go Team!!!! It is what we do and if I may say....what we do well.
Change can be very frightening for people. That is why some people stay in situations that most would wonder why in the world they are staying? But we must let go to find our happiness sometimes, if we find that isn't the case any longer where we are at the moment. You don't let go so that something good might happen. You let go to be the very best of yourself.
Many people don't have the luxury of choice. That is a sad position to be in and may explain why so many people seem so unhappy in their lives. For that reason, Gommy is very grateful. Grateful to have the option of changing something in my life that will ultimately be better for Grandpa and myself. Grateful for the Grace of God to have heard my plea. Grace is the invisible influence of the divine. With Grace, life's limitations are abolished. Evil disappears and there is nothing to fear any longer. Taking a 'leap of faith' means knowing there will be a net there for you when you do jump. Scary???? You bet....but you have to "Believe it to See it."..... not the other way around as most people live their life.
Gommy must admit, that I have asked many times in my life to bring me to 'center'...to the perfect life situation for me, or to change a situation that I no longer wanted in my life. God has always answered me and I am eternally grateful for that. We may not think we are 'getting' all that we ask for in prayer....but Goms has found that it is the 'time-frame' that confuses us. We do get what is best for us....but maybe not in the time-frame we expected. And we may get what is the best for us and not exactly what we specifically asked for. So just remember, that everything in the Universe is unfolding EXACTLY as it is supposed to happen. We may not like how things happen at times and other times we are crushed...like at the loss of a loved one. But that too, is how it is 'supposed' to be even though we don't understand how the 'plan' is unfolding at the time; if you can just go with the flow, you will eventually see, with clarity, that this is so.
So, Gommy wishes for anyone out there who is unhappy in their life situation, that they can take the 'Leap of Faith' after asking for Grace to help them find their right path in life. Instead of saying..."I must work harder for what I want"....flip it to " I must find new inspiration and a place where I am appreciated for my hard work." Instead of saying, "My dream failed"....say "I will find a dream that matches my reality"....instead of saying, "Everything in my life stinks!' , say "This too shall pass."....." because whether you are a success or a failure; the flow of life brings both realities to us, as temporary states. " (sic)
So Gommys' wish for you this week is to let go of something that isn't fulfilling to you any longer and ask for something that makes you much happier each day.....don't be afraid.....'Ask, Believe, Receive'. But the real secret is you HAVE to BELIEVE!!!!! You might just find yourself in a position that is a better fit and that you are truly appreciated for. Goms is pulling for you! Hugs and Mush to all!!!
This is the last Sunday that Gommy will have to work on a Sunday. Hooray and hallelujah! Gommy and Grandpa Mike are pretty excited about a new development in our lives. Goms is going to be working as Grandpa's assistant, at the golf course where Grandpa works. We have been Blessed in that Grandpa has procured so much business in his job as Sales Director, that he needs someone to help with the mountainous details and paperwork that comes with all that business. Voile'.....Gommy to the rescue....But to be honest...it was really Grandpa to the rescue of Gommy. Now Gommy will not have to work nights or weekends or Holidays any longer and Grandpa and I will have a 'normal' life again with supper together and collaborating on the daily business tasks as we have done in the past when we owned our own golf course for ten years. The added bonus this time around though, is that we don't have to worry about the rest of the zillions of things you have to worry about as an owner. It is much less stressful to go out and 'get' the business. Grandpa can do that with his eyes closed and one hand tied behind his back. And Gommy is good at being 'behind the scenes' and doing all the crossing of the T's and dotting the I's for Grandpa. Go Team!!!! It is what we do and if I may say....what we do well.
Change can be very frightening for people. That is why some people stay in situations that most would wonder why in the world they are staying? But we must let go to find our happiness sometimes, if we find that isn't the case any longer where we are at the moment. You don't let go so that something good might happen. You let go to be the very best of yourself.
Many people don't have the luxury of choice. That is a sad position to be in and may explain why so many people seem so unhappy in their lives. For that reason, Gommy is very grateful. Grateful to have the option of changing something in my life that will ultimately be better for Grandpa and myself. Grateful for the Grace of God to have heard my plea. Grace is the invisible influence of the divine. With Grace, life's limitations are abolished. Evil disappears and there is nothing to fear any longer. Taking a 'leap of faith' means knowing there will be a net there for you when you do jump. Scary???? You bet....but you have to "Believe it to See it."..... not the other way around as most people live their life.
Gommy must admit, that I have asked many times in my life to bring me to 'center'...to the perfect life situation for me, or to change a situation that I no longer wanted in my life. God has always answered me and I am eternally grateful for that. We may not think we are 'getting' all that we ask for in prayer....but Goms has found that it is the 'time-frame' that confuses us. We do get what is best for us....but maybe not in the time-frame we expected. And we may get what is the best for us and not exactly what we specifically asked for. So just remember, that everything in the Universe is unfolding EXACTLY as it is supposed to happen. We may not like how things happen at times and other times we are crushed...like at the loss of a loved one. But that too, is how it is 'supposed' to be even though we don't understand how the 'plan' is unfolding at the time; if you can just go with the flow, you will eventually see, with clarity, that this is so.
So, Gommy wishes for anyone out there who is unhappy in their life situation, that they can take the 'Leap of Faith' after asking for Grace to help them find their right path in life. Instead of saying..."I must work harder for what I want"....flip it to " I must find new inspiration and a place where I am appreciated for my hard work." Instead of saying, "My dream failed"....say "I will find a dream that matches my reality"....instead of saying, "Everything in my life stinks!' , say "This too shall pass."....." because whether you are a success or a failure; the flow of life brings both realities to us, as temporary states. " (sic)
So Gommys' wish for you this week is to let go of something that isn't fulfilling to you any longer and ask for something that makes you much happier each day.....don't be afraid.....'Ask, Believe, Receive'. But the real secret is you HAVE to BELIEVE!!!!! You might just find yourself in a position that is a better fit and that you are truly appreciated for. Goms is pulling for you! Hugs and Mush to all!!!
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